K. Silem Mohammad

Three Poems

link “The swans come hither in great numbers”

link Goldmine

link Anti-Ass

“The swans come hither in great numbers”

the swans come hither in great numbers
looking for a place to vomit that is obscure enough

for how should swallow contend with swans or what
compare as if to soul as on the salt sea boil

when swans by night from icy shores of Helicon
vomit out perforce (because so thick) the stores of bane?

for vomit and vomiting, Ralph is unusual
this guy did nothing but vomit all over the place

he remembered seeing a swan die
and he said in his head once I saw a swan die

unfortunately for him he became encumbered by the dead swan
a deconstructive nest in the unknown meaning of life

in our culture many people choose to use pairs of swans
to create an undetectable total mind-controlled slave

filled with a sinister creative brutality unleashed to sleep till bedtime
they began to vomit blood and rolled up their eyes

swan districts are an abomination! go the tigers
reflux superstructures whimper outserved intrepid gynarchy

unattended braintrust-plugging minuses won a Nutrisystem contract
stupid-brain rollercoaster mouths asserted “Africa podium hut”

dissonant biharmonic cream-puff underwear-freak bangers
mentally uncovered integral zebra-cellist-messiah dining halls

amazing feats of animal husbandry wherein I poked Mom in the ribs
driving away an intruder drawn from life by Mr Wood

swans as we know them are clean birds
lots of ‘em lined up for miles, mmmm, swan

I saw it on the bank while canoeing, eating flowers out of a swan
(you know what I mean) inside the swan, it all mmmm, Thames

the duck was looking good so far in a wonky swan sort of way
it was black and had the words “Led Zeppelin” in yellow

another bizarre and wonderful thing is that it had never made me vomit
although it caused many dogs to stop eating and have diarrhea


Goldmine

I type “slobbering anus” into Google
cuz I’m one big fat lazy exterminator nut
some people think I’m a gluttonous porcine
furry man-killing goldmine made of sweet gold

now I am a conservative
I’ve got the yawns
I come into your house and start sniffing at your crotch
classy I put the ass in class

dark energy rules the universe
darkness you crave so very much with slobbering lips
the universe in its perpetual motion really
made a complete fool out of Marilyn Manson

the trouble was there was maybe
two minutes total screen time of lions
cutting in scenes of puppies that grow up to be big dumb crabs
and become total whores for women’s soccer

a malevolent theology based on Alan Greenspan
an establishment tool who successes a pip in melee
his head is too far up to make puppies
and I can affirm I mean sucking my or your ass

Britney was moaning and slobbering all over my face
she’s Vegas celebrity murderers
total zombie problems
no matter how much of an ass a girl is she

another exciting essay in total punishment
it had one of those badass linen closets
this is just like total yeah
we’re slobbering the conversation


Anti-Ass

today looked like a fun sunny day so I decided to stay inside
my toes feel like small cherry-flavored popsicles
and my nipples are frighteningly now looking like
a big white international full-size jeep association

I like rock and heavy metal but like many things in life
it prevents any possibility of having pure container directories like I suggested
it’s good, it’s very good, a lot has gone into its creation and this
outshadows the few minor probs like slowdown

how amazing it is when you love a band like the Smiths or Morrissey
and indeed, they did look like they could be in the town of our raising
with a band like Bloc Party the truth is of course a damnable lie
in its place is a Toyota logo-shape slightly drooping on one side

I like to write, and sometimes as a writer you have to dig of the underworld
I have a habit of writing stories based on why
some ppl from Canada are eating Lay’s potato chips
if your mind becomes totally blank try writing something like “my mind is blank”

your butt is like a performance car baby!
“oh my god” covered in butter
it may look like a beautiful flower, but it sprang from shit
I say that in a good way

“uber-hotness”? like I don’t know
it was when the Avengers started acting like the Ultimates
that you get to the hard difficulties
I don’t care how hot some bitch that can’t act looks in a red suit

reply with quote much turdness _____
the soap came with the first scuttle, I melted it and poured it in
looks like square are mean like with 1:18 scale diecasts altogether
that as a Megadeth CD the guanoness of it makes me worrie

flyers being passed around at churches what kind of churches
vegan grocery am you know
this bird looks a little like my grandpa and don’t worry
I’m going to exvaporate your turdness from this umbapumpba gubelen

track coaches that wear their stopwatch in hallway like jewelry
overhear one side of a phone conversation that is going like this
“to anyone that feels like they are sexually inadequate, please let us know
get it confirmed and unbook if you can’t make it god damn

BTW you type using bananas or it also makes you look
like an idiot secondly, when the impellor is on that doesn’t sound
like the “V8 killer” you previously made it out to be
seriously Joey lights out award any pressure whatsoever

I dont see how that would be like I got you or that’s funny but that’s
not pimping them because of the poly bushings, can you
press in a stock bushing into a tera arm like the re- ones?
about how it was the best ever and shriekingly deny

and it sounded like I said ‘the his turdness’ grin grin smiley
very funny thank you later for today, I think I remain,
dear father, I need you!” whoa that was deep
it’s like everyone is afraid to show nudity or disregard my prior comment about it

what kinds of bread don’t I like? I’m preferential toward sourdough
I won’t deny its turdness or its dickness still, I would eat that
I like to oat, oat, oples and bononos
dammit the bitch is coming back out

Melissa is like a good will ambassador that you can bang in the ass
she would’ve undergone choreography
in maintainability and chases python folks away
being miserable and treating other people like dirt

this “turdness” of zope groin with a fungo bat
conclusion: do not get this unless you just want a gravity
like the cold start issue someone mentioned along with a glow plug issue
well you guys talk like you’re pirates or something

everyone knows the magic numbers are a big pile
they enclose some kind of experimental spelling
which is a problem it’s also stuff like tense and verb
oh yeah, my point is I feel like my vote doesn’t even count

what exactly is a level of turdness and how many levels are there?
I feel like I’m walking in the dark
I use it as a cue to breathe deeply
but I make my icons and they mega suck

K. Silem Mohammad lives in Ashland, Oregon. He is the author of Deer Head Nation (Tougher Disguises, 2003), A Thousand Devils (Combo Books, 2004), and Breathalyzer (Edge Books, 2006). He maintains the poetry and poetics blog a href="http://limetree.ksilem.com/{lime tree}</ a>.

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